Tim Collins Books in Order

A thousand humorous questions invite readers to calculate how geeky they are across hobbies, habits, relationships, and childhood memories. Quizzes and compatibility tests turn familiar interests in computers, entertainment, and trivia into a playful self-assessment.

This humorous glossary explores the slang, expressions, and social codes of contemporary English. Cultural commentary and etiquette advice accompany explanations of unfamiliar phrases, helping readers decipher the changing vocabulary of everyday conversation and urban popular culture.

This compact guide introduces the unwritten etiquette of finding a partner online. It covers composing a dating profile, choosing a photograph, beginning email conversations, and moving toward real-life dates while considering the different people encountered along the way.

A humorous guide addresses the teasing, stereotypes, and unwanted attention experienced by redheads. Through comic advice and observations about ginger identity, it encourages readers to respond to ridicule with confidence rather than embarrassment about their hair.

This comic survival manual celebrates baldness and examines the social embarrassment surrounding hair loss. Famous bald figures, prejudices, and attempts to disguise a thinning head become material for a humorous argument in favor of accepting it.

An alphabetical companion to Dan Brown's The Lost Symbol examines its historical references, scientific ideas, and symbolic mysteries. Entries explore Freemasonry, America's founders, Washington architecture, and related subjects, distinguishing the novel's fictional narrative from its surrounding context.

This humorous introduction explains how to begin using Twitter as it existed during its early popularity. Codes, abbreviations, notable celebrity accounts, and unusual feeds accompany practical observations about participating in the platform's brief, public online conversations.

Northern English identity receives a comic defense through regional stereotypes, famous northerners, and advice for venturing south. Comparisons of language, prices, and everyday attitudes form a humorous guide to maintaining northern pride beyond familiar home territory.

Nigel Mullet became a vampire at fifteen and remains trapped in awkward adolescence, complete with acne and romantic insecurity. His diary records embarrassing parents, school frustrations, and increasingly desperate efforts to attract his crush Chloe Sparrow.

Teenage vampire Nigel Mullet lacks the glamour and impressive powers he believes the undead should possess. As a beautiful newcomer catches his attention, he fills his diary with anxious plans and terrible poetry while struggling to approach her.

Quiet, mathematically gifted Luke Thorpe starts growing hair, howling, and outgrowing his clothes at alarming speed. Discovering his werewolf heritage sends the reluctant teenager into a pack and toward a conflict with vampires he never anticipated.

Nigel Mullet's improved powers and romance with Chloe seem to promise a happy school year. Then handsome newcomer Jason takes his place, prompting Nigel to investigate his rival and discover a supernatural complication behind the competition.

Dave Cross resolves to spend a year proving he is cheerful after receiving a grumpy old man's diary. A failed marriage, demanding new boss, approaching fiftieth birthday, and daily irritations repeatedly undermine his attempt at optimism.

Young Roman Dorkius Maximus wants to become a celebrated hero and asks family friend Stoutus to teach him fighting. His diary reveals how bullying, indifferent parents, and a shortage of natural bravery complicate his ambitions for glory.

Dorkius joins Julius Caesar on a journey to Egypt, where political rivalries prove less straightforward than his dreams of adventure. Encounters with young King Ptolemy and Cleopatra place the awkward Roman boy close to momentous historical events.

Nigel Mullet leads a Scottish island vampire coven but would rather pursue romance than settle disputes. After handing authority to newcomer Viktor, he discovers a ruthless replacement and is drawn into organizing resistance against the new leader.

Vampire Nigel Mullet finds running the coven on Hirta a tiresome distraction from girls and games. Letting Viktor take command creates a much bigger problem, forcing the reluctant teenager to challenge the tyrant he helped install.

Dorkius resents spending summer in Pompeii until investigating Mount Vesuvius gives him something more urgent to worry about. Amid local superstition, he becomes convinced the volcano could erupt and tries to persuade the town to take his warnings seriously.

A new joke shop fills Aaron’s school with novelty pranks, but the tricks appear to inflict real injuries. With Halloween approaching, he investigates the source of the harm before playful mischief becomes something much darker.

Alien Harry arrives in his spacebin to take Colin on another adventure, but Colin's troublesome little brother must accompany them. His constant sneezing becomes an added complication when the travelers encounter hostile aliens away from Earth.

Colin grows suspicious of his unusually tidy new classmate Harry, who spends time inside a school rubbish bin. Following him reveals lights and machinery instead of waste, launching Colin into an unexpected journey beyond ordinary classroom life.

Andy and Sarah distrust Dave while their classmates embrace him, copying his clothes and behavior and joining his strange club. Discovering what lies behind his popularity leaves the pair confronting a threat without anyone willing to help.

Newcomer Simone expects eccentric villagers, but their fixation on Morris dancing, maypoles, and the mysterious Green Man unsettles her. When the village parade takes a disturbing turn, she realizes she must escape the community she thought merely strange.

Rachel meets Leon, whose interests and personality seem perfectly matched to hers, then discovers her father designed him as a robot. Attraction conflicts with anger at becoming an experiment, forcing her to question what makes love real.

Fifteen-year-old Josh Walker decides to stop merely reading superhero comics and become a crimefighter himself. With friend Henry as his sidekick, plastic handcuffs, and stink bombs, he discovers how poorly heroic fantasies prepare him for real trouble.

Holly tests a school legend about a black-eyed ghost appearing when someone blinks three times before a mirror. The experiment brings far more than curiosity bargained for, turning the school toilets into the start of a frightening haunting.

Unable to ignore threatening messages any longer, Alice enlists her friend Chris to identify the person targeting her. Tracking down the troll reveals that discovering an online tormentor’s identity can mark the beginning of an even worse nightmare.

The League of Enchanted Heroes follows a witch to a gingerbread castle, reviving Hansel's memories of captivity. To help the team defeat her, he must control his anger and develop a plan rather than be overwhelmed by the past.

The League discovers an abandoned treasure chest in the woods, ignoring Red Riding Hood's caution. When Gretel takes a cursed mirror and turns against her companions, the others must destroy it before its influence tears their team apart.

The League of Enchanted Heroes journeys to the North Mountains to confront a dragon. Their familiar superpowers prove insufficient against its fire, forcing the fairy-tale companions to seek a different solution before the creature overwhelms them.

The League of Enchanted Heroes pursues a giant into the ordinary world, where innocent people are at risk. The fairy-tale team must catch the escaped creature before its presence creates further danger outside the realm they know.

Tom Thumb enters a wrestling competition at the Anotherland Olympics while his fellow Enchanted Heroes cheer him on. When they discover that rival Rumpelstiltskin intends to cheat, supporting their teammate becomes a problem that demands more than encouragement.

In a world where hospitals have closed and disease spreads, Esme can briefly remove pain through touch. Her gift makes her valuable to powerful people, and bounty hunters pursue her as she seeks a community offering safety.

Tom Thumb is trapped inside a giant's stomach, where the acid threatens his life. Jack, Red Riding Hood, Rapunzel, Hansel, and Gretel must quickly devise a rescue that reaches their tiny teammate before time runs out.

The League of Enchanted Heroes undertakes a rescue mission to free a handsome prince imprisoned in a high tower. Familiar fairy-tale figures combine their abilities as Jack, Rapunzel, Red Riding Hood, Tom Thumb, Hansel, and Gretel confront the challenge.

Ariel conceals the ability to create storms until Sebastian pushes him too far on a school trip. Losing control releases the power he kept hidden, putting everyone around him in danger and transforming an ordinary outing into a crisis.

Jack enters a dark woodland where familiar fairy-tale figures become part of his journey. Encounters with Rapunzel, Tom Thumb, Hansel and Gretel, Little Red Riding Hood, and possibly a giant turn the forest into an unpredictable adventure.

Lost in a dark forest, the League of Enchanted Heroes accepts shelter from apparently friendly villagers. The welcome becomes unsettling as the team realizes that their unusually hairy hosts conceal a threat behind the offer of refuge.

Harry and Colin visit a planet ruled by enormous hamsters and are captured during a sightseeing expedition. Treated as classroom pets and confined to a human-sized cage, they must find a way out before holiday care makes matters worse.

Young squire Roderick dreams of heroic knighthood despite struggling with weapons, horses, and martial training. His diary follows life at Doddingford Castle as a mission involving stolen holy relics offers a chance to prove himself beyond those shortcomings.

Thomas dreams of piracy while traveling aboard a merchant ship with his parents in the eighteenth century. When pirates capture the vessel, he joins their crew and discovers that life at sea falls far short of his romantic expectations.

Escaped criminal Galactic Gary seeks a time bomb capable of scrambling the days of the week. Harry and Colin race across three planets to recover its hidden components before the villain can threaten more than ordinary life in the galaxy.

Imran is stranded on Monster Island in fog so dense that he cannot see the dangers around him. An angry roar announces an approaching creature, turning his search for escape into a confrontation with an unseen threat.

Mina and Yasmin remain trapped on Monster Island as a frightening creature approaches. With the island's eccentric Captain offering no useful help, the two girls must face the danger themselves while still hoping to find a route away.

Kelly and Josh venture into the woods on Monster Island and encounter a hungry wolf. The immediate threat is only part of their trouble, as something more frightening waits deeper among the trees while they struggle to survive.

Scott and Jess climb a wall on Monster Island while searching for a way to escape. Instead of a safe route, they find another deadly threat beyond the barrier, putting their effort to leave the dangerous island at risk.

Teenager Ellie loves the idea of exploring Mars, but a misunderstanding unexpectedly places her in astronaut training for the first human mission there. Her diary follows a determined, awkward effort to demonstrate that she deserves the opportunity.

Unlucky teenage fossil hunter Ann records her efforts to show that the bones she discovers matter. An expedition to the American West offers a fresh chance to make discoveries, overcome setbacks, and gain recognition for her work.

Stranded on Monster Island, Kyle builds a raft in hopes of escaping by sea. Getting away from the island's dangers proves difficult when something lurking beneath the water threatens his attempt to reach safety.

Jade searches for a boat that could take her away from Monster Island. Climbing into snowy terrain, she shelters in a cave, only to discover that her refuge contains a frightening danger of its own.

Arjun sees an evil face on the ceiling during a night at Horror Hotel. His frightening experience unfolds in a mysterious forest hotel where monsters, unusual technology and an eccentric manager make a stay increasingly unsettling.

Jayden dreams of a very tall, thin man with long, sharp fingernails. Staying at Horror Hotel, he faces the disturbing possibility that the figure belongs to more than sleep and that his nightmares signal real danger.

Tyrone and Noah enter a lift at Horror Hotel, where ordinary facilities conceal unsettling dangers. The boys' experience adds another threat to a mysterious forest hotel already occupied by monsters, strange technology and an eccentric manager.

Robert works as an actor at London's Globe Theatre in the early seventeenth century. With King James's coronation threatening the theatre, he needs a plan to protect his career and avoid returning to collecting dog droppings.

In Egypt's Valley of the Kings in 1922, Ahmed works on Howard Carter's excavation as a photographer. Impatient for a discovery, the young tomb hunter records his efforts to uncover secrets buried beneath the desert.

Kelly looks into her bedroom mirror at Horror Hotel and sees a woman carrying an axe. Unsure whether her mind is deceiving her, she confronts another frightening mystery inside the strange hotel hidden in the forest.

Liam dislikes the frightening pictures hanging on Horror Hotel's walls. As he spends time in the mysterious forest hotel, those images take on a more disturbing significance, raising the possibility that they are warnings of danger.

Nadia cannot sleep because loud scratching sounds disturb her room at Horror Hotel. Investigating the noise brings her closer to a terrifying discovery in a forest hotel where the guests face dangers behind seemingly ordinary surroundings.

In Athens in 380 BC, Alexander assists an athlete who becomes ill on competition day. His unexpected opportunity to compete is complicated by a plot against Athens, forcing him to face challenges beyond his athletic shortcomings.

Marcus travels from Pompeii to Rome with his father in AD 79 and ignores orders to stay put. Swapping clothes with a gladiator who resembles him leaves the boy captured and expected to fight in the arena.

Fourteen-year-old Suki wants to follow her father and brother as a samurai in sixteenth-century Japan. Her training goes badly, but bandits threaten her village while its men are away at war, putting her ambitions to the test.

In Los Angeles in 1915, Clara works behind the scenes for film producer Mr Cheeseman and dreams of becoming a director. Her diary records the mishaps that complicate an aspiring filmmaker's career in early Hollywood.

Modern technology turns routine tasks into bewildering mishaps, from stubborn video-call filters to unreliable Wi-Fi and overcomplicated televisions. Tim Collins gathers the comic frustrations of digital life, showing how tools intended to simplify everyday activities create fresh embarrassment.

Algerian children Malik and Leila become Gustave Eiffel’s apprentices in nineteenth-century Paris, helping construct the Statue of Liberty. Their ideas then contribute to the Eiffel Tower, bringing them into the challenges and mishaps of an ambitious engineering project.

Dog detective Sherlock Bones and his feline assistant, Dr Catson, investigate missing jewels at Kennel Palace. Multiple suspects and fading clues complicate the case, while puzzles invite readers to help the detectives follow the evidence.

Tim Collins gathers embarrassing and baffling tweets that reveal the hazards of posting before thinking. From simple mistakes to confidently nonsensical statements, the collection turns everyday social-media blunders into examples of public humiliation and unintended comedy.

Fourteen-year-old Halfdan defies his father’s plans and joins a Viking raid, hoping to prove his bravery. Disaster sends him and friend Astrid on a perilous voyage with Leif Erikson toward an unfamiliar land.